No Fair Warning

When you are expecting a baby everyone has advice.  How much and what to eat while pregnant, what book is the best to read to ensure your baby is sleeping through the night in a few weeks, who the best pediatrician is, they even have advice on naming that precious little being, the list goes on and on.  However, not one single person prepared me for those decisions that keep you up at night, the ones that weigh so heavy on your heart, that have you constantly asking yourself if you are making the right decision for this little person that you love beyond words, that you have been put in place to protect.
We have been faced with one of those decisions.  Our little girl will turn three in April.  I remember, even last year, three seemed so far away.  And to be honest, I am starting to feel like three is right around the corner with big changes: a big girl bed, fully potty trained...Preschool.

Ever since Lila was 3 months old she has been on the waiting list at one of the Montessori schools here in town.  I have a friend who had told me about the Montessori teachings and structure many years ago and I remember being totally impressed and rather convinced that would, someday, be where I sent my children.  Fast forward many years later, Mike and I tour the school, get the lay of the land, leave excited and ready for Lila to start preschool there, this was last August.  As the time has gotten closer and closer, Mom has gotten more and more stressed about it. 

Lila is fortunate enough to have the most wonderful in home daycare provider.  (Mom and Dad are lucky, too).  I often think of my daughter throughout the day, wondering if she is having fun?  Did she take a nap?  Never have I ever had that pit in my stomach wondering if she was okay?  Is our provider keeping a watchful eye over her?  Was she getting enough attention?  It is the most amazing feeling to know that your daughter is loved and cared for by someone who truly loves what they are doing and takes their job seriously about the role they play in these little ones lives.  That is why I am struggling so much with the idea of preschool. 

The biggest struggle is the thought of taking Lila out of her wonderful in home situation to a completely different place.  While preschool only lasts a few hours a day, at Montessori it would require Mike and I to make the decision to do wrap around care five days a week full time.  And while last year that didn't sound like that big of a deal, it seems like a much bigger deal now!  With our family being a two parent working household, Lila will need formal care for many years of her young life and when she goes to elementary school we will have limited options for care other than that of the school.  So, the question becomes while we have this amazing daycare provider, do we end that prematurely or is there another answer?  This Friday I think we found our answer!

Lila, Mike and I had received an invitation to another local preschool that has come highly recommended (thanks friends!) and thought, maybe we owe it to ourselves to check this out.  Our visit on Friday afternoon was wonderful and the best part about it is their program for three year olds is a 2 or 3 day program, so we can have the best of both worlds!  We would have the structure and learning environment more similar to "school," yet she will continue to have the love and nurture of our in home provider that has known, and had a hand in raising, our little girl since she was 8 weeks old.

As a Mom, we get those gut checks that sometimes hit you out of nowhere.  Here I was, so settled in my thoughts, Montessori was the answer, no doubt.  But then something in my gut told me I needed to explore our options and I am glad we did, because these decisions, that no one prepares you for, they are major and I just want the best for my little girl!